Surgery Update

Here it is already two days post-surgery and I am recovering quite well.  The surgery was a success!  The doctor tested the device to make sure it worked okay and apparently it does so that is a good sign.

The doctor made a roughly 3-inch incision behind my ear running up my head.  I left the hospital wearing a contraption that looks like a breast cup on my ear with a headband going around the edge of my hairline.  It was a novelty at first and quickly became more of an irritant as it became itchy.  But, hey, headbands are popular again, aren't they?

The pain was quite mild so I only needed to take one pain pill.  I try to not take any more than I really need.  I will continue to take antibiotics for 10 days to ward off an infection.  I didn't have any balance or dizziness issues at first, but I am feeling slightly off today for some reason.  My jaw is sore so it is a little difficult to eat some foods.  I'll be eating more Jello it looks like and the best food of all for a soft-food diet -- ice cream!  The left side of my mouth feels a little weird, kind of like a constant metallic taste.  It hasn't affected the way food tastes, but it's constantly there.

Tom's doing a great job at playing nurse, cleaning my wound three times a day.  We both expected a bigger shaved patch of hair around the incision, but you really can't see anything.  I have too much hair!  I guess in this case that is a good thing.  I have to keep the area dry.  I can't wash my hair for 10 days.  Yep, that's right -- 10 days!!  It's only 2 days post-op and I'm feeling itchy and would love to wash my hair and scrub away.  I only have to wait 8 days for that.  Whenever I think it's bad all I need to do is remember how nasty things were when I recovered from my tonsillectomy in 2008.  This is nothing compared to feeling like you are gargling shards of glass every time you swallow.

My left ear feels like something is missing since I've been wearing a hearing aid with an ear mold for the last 20 years.  In some ways it feels like my ear isn't even there anymore.  It is a hard sensation to describe. 

I have two follow-up visits with my doctor (the surgeon).  The activation date is set for November 25, the Tuesday before Thanksgiving.  My audiologist from St. Luke's Hearing and Balance will be doing my mappings for me (that's what they call the programming of the cochlear implant processor.  She'll map my processor according to my audiogram).  Until this time, I will only be able to hear out of my right ear.  Like everything else in this journey, it will take some getting used to.  My new way of hearing is a work in progress and I'm only in the beginning phase.  Stay tuned for more.

Sentimental Journey

Okay, I’ll admit it.  I’ve been getting sentimental this last week.  Who ever thought one could feel this way about a hearing aid?

As I count down the days to surgery, I’ve been reminding myself that soon I won’t have something in my left ear all the time.  I’ve been wearing a hearing aid in it for 20 years.  My hearing aid has become a part of me, an essential part of my daily life. 

The other day I came to the realization I will never hear like I do now ever again.  Wow, that’s kind of a heavy thought.  Hearing with hearing aids is still natural hearing.  Hearing aids are just amplifying sound so I can hear.  But hearing with a cochlear implant is mechanical since the device does the hearing your ear can no longer do. 

Everyone I know who wears a cochlear implant has told me when they were first activated everyone sounded like Darth Vader or maybe even Mickey Mouse.  Eventually the mind learns what the sounds are and the robotic-sounding voices start to sound more natural.  But music is another story, and is the primary reason why I dragged my feet in making the decision to get implanted.    

Music is complex and takes a long time for the implantee to appreciate once their device is activated.  Sometimes it can take years to fully appreciate it again and it requires a lot of listening practice to get to that point.  As a music lover I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately.  So this morning I decided to enjoy my music these last two days as much as possible.  I put on my Compilot, my Bluetooth device that allows music from my iPhone to go straight into my ears.  I’ve been listening to some of my favorite songs from the 80s like Come on Eileen, Billie Jean and It’s My Life (by Talk Talk) to more current songs like Counting Stars by One Republic and The Black Keys’ Lonely Boy. 

Tomorrow Noah has his first orchestra concert of the school year (he plays violin).  I plan to enjoy and appreciate it like never before knowing that I probably won’t feel the same way at the next one. 

Decisions, Decisions

Making the decision to get a cochlear implant is not something that can be done hastily, nor should it be.  A person with normal hearing might think if someone struggles so much to hear, it should be a no-brainer to want to get a cochlear implant.  But the whole should I/shouldn't I dilemma is a mixed bag of emotions.  

First, I'll state the obvious -- no one wants a doctor to cut into their scalp and insert something that looks like a flattened squid and then stick the little squid's tentacles (electrodes) into their cochlea.  No surgery of any kind should be entered into unless the benefit will outweigh the risk. 

The Slim Straight that I will have implanted

People with hearing loss are very protective of their ears, hanging on to every last bit of hearing they have left.  In the past, the process of inserting the electrodes into a patient's cochlea stripped it of all the hair cells, leaving the person completely deaf.  Now it is possible, in some cases, for the surgeon to retain the patient's hearing in the low frequencies. This is encouraging to me and I am cautiously optimistic about my outcome.  

Some people with hearing loss do quite well with hearing aids and/or speech reading so they don’t feel compelled to get implanted.  Getting implanted is an all-or-nothing commitment.  Once you get one, you can’t go back to wearing a hearing aid.  One thing implants and hearing aids have in common is they don’t restore or cure hearing.  

A lot of people don't like change.  Hearing with a cochlear implant is very different than hearing naturally through your ear, even if you wear a hearing aid.  It requires a lot of patience and hard work because in order to get the most out of it, you need to commit to daily aural rehabilitation.  Many recipients say voices sound robotic or like Darth Vader at first, but with practice they start to sound like you remember them. 

Electing to get a cochlear implant is only the first of many decisions I am making in my journey toward improved hearing and understanding.  There are three companies that make cochlear implants and each one comes out with a newer and better processor every few years.  I am going with Cochlear America and their newest processor the Nucleus 6.  Cochlear has FDA approval for wireless accessories that will work with my processor and allow me to hear over the phone and the TV better.  

And speaking of the accessories, I get to pick five of them as a bundled package that is all thrown in to the cost that insurance covers.   There are many things to choose from such as the kind of remote, plastic covers to bling-out the processor, type of battery, water-proof case so you can wear it in the pool, cables, blah, blah, blah...the list goes on.  And not only do I choose the types of accessories, but the different colors! The picture below shows some of the fun colors the covers come in. (Sorry, I can't get the picture rotated -- let me know if you know how to do this).

It is hard to decide what I will need since I’ve never had a cochlear implant, but there are more than five things I'd like to have.  I know it's not even Halloween yet, but maybe I better start writing my letter to Santa.

Welcome to I Hear Ya!

As I have gotten older I've learned to care less and less what people think of me.  I've become more open with sharing what daily life is like when you have a hearing loss. According to the Hearing Loss Association of America (HLAA), 48 million Americans report some degree of hearing loss.  Yikes, that's a lot of people.  Most likely you know someone who falls into this category.  Or maybe that someone is you.

The last couple of years I've been thinking about getting a cochlear implant.  Now the time has come.  On October 29 I will be getting implanted in my left ear.  I am going bionic and I'm excited!  And a little nervous and anxious.  I don't expect to have long nails by the time the day arrives. 

From the encouragement of others, I decided to start this blog in hopes it serves as an educational tool for those that are curious about my hearing journey or are experiencing hearing loss themselves. Please leave a comment and share your thoughts.